“THE WALRUS”

…Screw the “egg man” (although his omelets I still look forward to everyday!),
I just spent 10 hours less than 5 feet from Bono. I'm not usually star struck. Of course this is the first time I've worked with a star.

Man, was I struck.

Although, had someone told me years ago that he was so short, I may have gotten out of bed on time for school more often, sparing myself (and probably my family) the humiliation of running through neighbors' yards to make the next stop, or simply chasing the bus down in tears. (Remember those days Mom)? The cool thing is that all of those little daydreams came true for me today. At least the PG-13 ones did. Heh hem.

As always, the day began with the teamster van picking me up at the crack of night. I had trouble sleeping because I was actually a little nervous about meeting one of my biggest childhood idols. Due to the unrelenting weather, we couldn't shoot in the woods so we did the outdoor scenes indoors at Steiner Studios in Brooklyn, using what is called in the film world "Blue Screen." Which is a giant GREEN screen. (This allows for computer graphics to place the proper elements around us later).

As I sat having my make up done, one of the PA's came in to ask the other make-up girl if she had finished the rest of the cast and was "ready for Bono." I thought I was going to puke eggs. Knowing my nervousness and excitement, the girls gave me the option of finishing me in a hurry OR slowing down. I chose to seize the moment and meet Bono. At 8am, under fluorescent lights and pre-caffeinated nonetheless. Moments later he came in singing a Johnny Cash song in a very raggedy (he played the garden the night before) voice, and practicing his western accent for the role of Dr. Robert, our California guru. He was in full western wardrobe with, of course, those damn sunglasses we never see him without these days.

He introduced himself to me and I just laughed as I took his hand. Yes, because I was nervous, but also because I was thinking "of course I know you're BONO!!" Anyway, once I regained composure (somewhat) I said something stupid to him like, "I'm trying to just tell myself that you're a normal person, but, you're not, you're BONO!" He laughed and replied with his western accent that he is not normal and he'd prove it to me later. (Read on)

I finally tore myself away when one of our make-up artists said loudly: "Okay, Dana, you're done and now you’re just gawking". Bono just laughed and told me not to worry, that we'd talk plenty on set.

The first scene to shoot was the last scene of this song sequence, where Bono (Dr. Robert) lands us in front of "The Headquarters of the League of Spiritual Deliverance" and proceeds to give us a lecture on "transcendental perception" (??). It was still early morning and Bono was still half asleep. He kept flubbing his lines. After numerous flubs, (I was starting to worry and I wasn't the only one) a little tension started to creep in, but Bono brilliantly broke the ice (and caught us all way off guard) with: "I'm sorry people, what can I say? I'm a rock star." We all had a good laugh at this. Then he NAILED the first scene, in his first film ever.

We were then positioned on the roof of our magic flying bus which was made from an old fashioned school bus that the art department completely gutted, graffitied and designed to be a very hip hippy traveling home with bunk beds and a spiral staircase leading to the roof. The scene begins with Bono singing to us "The Walrus" as he (and the LSD) transports us to The League. In between a GAZILLION takes of various scenes we swapped stories about life, love, music, religion, politics, drugs and Hitler. And Hitler on drugs. Cocaine to be exact. With childlike awe, Bono enlightened us all to the fact that it is now common knowledge that Hitler was indeed a coke head. He was so strangely excited by this.

Anyway, it was time to party and trip. (Like I wasn't already?!)

With Bono's AMAZING rendition of "The Walrus" blasting all around us, we climbed and danced and writhed all over our magic bus with 10 giant fans blowing "the wind" in our hair. As the crew rocked the bus (literally), Bono ROCKED "The Walrus." We just danced and screamed and ooooooooohed all around him slowly working our way inside the bus, where we sprawled ourselves out on the carpets, bunk beds, staircase (you just have to see it!) and began to shoot what turned out for me to be THE MOST AMAZING SCENE I JUST MIGHT EVER HAVE!!! Still singing The Walrus, Bono started at the back of the bus where pranksters and cast mates were all piled on top of each other by now. He worked his way up to the front of the bus where I sat banging on bongos. When he got to me he suddenly decided to improvise by grabbing my arm and licking it, sucking my fingers, pouncing on me and teasing me with almost-kisses and singing to me with his mouth less than a centimeter from mine. OH MY GOD I was the chosen one!!

I was praying that we’d have to do our usual numerous amounts of takes to get it from all angles. The A.D. asked if we were ready for the next take or if I needed a cigarette first. My work ethic took over so I suggested we just do this over and over until we get it right. It just got better and better. Bono said to me later that he hoped I didn't mind his "deciding to have a go at me." I said, "Oh PLEASE, have a go! Have a few!!"

We wrapped the scene by 7pm. Bono had to split. We all hugged him good-bye and he said he'd see us in November (when we shoot the party scene with him!). He also invited us to the show tomorrow at the Garden. We're going!!

The rest of the evening was spent shooting me and the gang partying in the bus. Still so high on our experience with Bono, we went CRAZY. Julie wanted things in fast motion, slow motion, bizarre motion. We danced and climbed on top of each other, busting open bags of multi colored beans and jugs of water (the props) and pouring everything we could find as well as ourselves, all over each other, singing and squealing and so on and so forth.

I can't believe I'm actually getting paid for this!

We wrapped about 9 and were taken to our vans.

It was gushing rain as we crossed the Manhattan Bridge. I looked out the window thinking this is a long way from Wildwood, Florida.